Pity POP

There's this Blackberry commercial that features U2 performing some song that quite unfortunatley is seared into my brain due to it's incessant repetition on TV and even the internet. It starts out "every generation has a chance to change the world..." and finishes with "...I'm gonna go crazy if I don't go crazy tonight".
This begs a few questions:
1)Have I gone crazy?
2)Why havn't I blown up the world yet?
3)Exactly what do Blackberries have to do with saving the world?
4)How many Bonos does it take to screw in a light bulb (1 to hold it, and the world to revolve around him)
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaooooooooooooooooooooooo!
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How can a movie as bad as The Postman have something as brilliant as that cameo by Tom Petty as himself?
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The best named store in America. Norwalk, CT's own Bob's Unpainted Furniture Gun Exchange
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In a nod to the era of Autotune, Merriam-Webster has officially changed the word "Shorty" to the three word phrase "Sho-Ta-Ie"
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Speaking of sho-ta-ie. I saw this kid Justin Bieber performing at the annual Arthur Ashe kids day event the day before the US Open. He's evidently "Usher's protege", a 12 year old white boy who repeatedly says sho-ta-ie in his song. Every time he said it I thought he should be lynched.
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Some Brooklyn based band names: Shoe Lace, Water Balloon, Salad Tong, Birthday Card, Pearl Cream, Damp Cloth, Rubber Stamp, Ugly Tire, Happy Teeth, Desktop Fear, Morose Germans, Paper Clip and Cleanup in Ilse Thrive
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Just saw a Daily News headline "Jon Gosselin's girlfriend 'Hailey Glassman' is looking for a new man on Match.com".....sorry everyone, we've gone too far, get your affairs in order, I have to blow up the world now.
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The Grabbing Hands

Every few days I get a little extra disgusted by the way that the current "debate" in American politics over healthcare has been turning out. The Democrats have super majorities in the House and Senate, and have an incredibly popular and publicly persuasive president (unintentional alliteration of the year award?). And yet they're still unable to even stand some sort of ground on getting every American health care, or even at least a cheaper public option. The lobbying thats going on over this healthcare bill is mind blowing. Literally hundreds of healthcare industry lobbyists are in Washington EVERYDAY trying to insure that we don't make the leap that every other western democracy in the world has to making the healthcare of our citizens a moral and civil obligation of the government.
Where would our country be today if in the time of so many historical pieces of legislation in our past there was the type of influence of money and power from groups whose interests so strongly oppose the public interest? I'm certain black and women's rights would have come along much slower. I doubt very much that we would have social security or medicare.

Socialized medicine will kill us all, your money belongs in your pocket, not helping to keep some old hag away from Sarah Palin's Death Panel
But by all means use my money to fund the NFL and Major League Baseball (and use our money/waste Congress' time investigating weather they used performance enhancing drugs)
You don't want a bureaucrat between you and your doctor, someone from your insurance company or HMO is good enough.
Oh enough with my multiple sargasms....take it away Gipper...

"between you and me....I hate politics" -Dan Bern

Can I Fly?

I have a 2 year old nephew named Arian who comes up from Dallas to visit my mom fairly often with his grandmother, my aunt Ziba. A few weeks ago I decided to show Arian a fun time and I picked him up and carried him "flying" around the house and yard. I immediately realized the monster I had created when I put him down. He had no sooner hit the ground than he was jumping back up, arms outstretched, pleading with me "can I fly?" "can I fly?". Knowing Arian's language as I do, I understood that he was not asking if he really could fly, but rather was asking me to help him fly once more. So being one who is always inclined to bring joy to those who seek it, I picked him up again and flew him around some more. This time when I put him down I found that picking up a 2 year old and running around the house and up and down stairs can be quite tiring for my out of shape self. While I was inclined to rest at least for a little while, Arian's response was simply "can I fly?" "can I fly Normyyy?". I never found a way to properly distract him post flight so as to not leave him always wanting more. What I have found though is an instructive opportunity, a teachable moment if you will in these requests. Arian is at the age where gifts are lavished upon him, especially while he is here in the northeast visiting family. The other evening he returned home from my aunt's house with a little pink stuffed dog that my aunt had given him. The dog had a shirt with a peace symbol on it. I took this opportunity to attempt to teach Arian what the symbol was and what "peace" meant. Furthermore I taught him what the two fingered peace sign is and tried to show him how to do it. It was of course not easy (picture the average person attempting the vulcan "live long and prosper" salute). I decided that night that it would be my mission to teach Arian this hand gesture and pictured him taking it back to Texas with him and helping to save the world. My ingenious plan is this: every time Arian exclaims "can I fly?" I respond with "show me the peace sign" and I retrain him to flash the symbol and say "PEEEETH!". Progress is slow, but I give it another 24 hours before he's a regular Cindy Sheehan at the rate he goes. I believe, that he believes, that he can touch the sky!

We Will Get What We Want

We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want We Will Get What We Want

Globo Warning?

The Reverend Billy is running for mayor of New York City and has my official endorsement (I'm also giving him a "thumbs up" at this very moment but it doesn't come through as well in text).
VoteRevBilly.org

VoteRevBilly.org
Spent a bit of time today with a lot of the folks from The Company that I haven't seen since I left. Various levels of alienation from them, some just "acted like they don't know"; forgetting perhaps that I have always advocated a firm "act like ya know" policy
'Round this time last week a wave was carrying my body and crashing it down upon and elderly swimming suit clad lady. Quite an interesting metaphor.
"Metaphors are not to be trifled with. A single metaphor can give birth to love"
Love has been gnawing at me like I was seared in garlic for quite a bit now. Such a fascinating game it is to play, just when the dark clouds seem to part, they reveal the mountains.
elpoep tsom naht retteb sgniht tsom
Of the many whatnotppenstances that living in New York City has helped me to understypher, one of my favorites has to be the following situation; when a brief interaction you have with a stranger is so real, that the person is compelled to say goodbye when it's over.

'Round this time last week I was skinnydipping in the ocean off Montauk under a beautiful star-filled night's sky. My friend Tim noticed that there were glowing blue dots in the water around us that seemed more than just reflections of the many stars. We soon realized that we were swimming amongst tiny bioluminescent life forms that glowed blue when disturbed. My experience of existence was so dense at that moment; nude in the water, the strength and fury of the waves bouncing and tossing my body, and the microscopic beings that let their existence be known to the world because of my presence. Glowing there in the water I remembered how life is for the living.
Without me you are nothing.